To Boldly Go
by Molahsurey
Summary: This is a slow building slash story. It's supposed to mainly be about Kirk/McCoy but there is also some Kirk/Spock, maybe even some Spock/McCoy. I try to put at least some adventure into it. Let me know if I'm moving to fast with it.
1. Chapter 1

James Kirk was sitting in his captain's chair spacing out to the familiar beeping of the consoles on the bridge. It took him a while to notice that Uhura was talking to him.

"Captain, I repeat, there is a distress call coming from the planet below."

"Hmm…?" He jerked his head up from its resting place on his hand and glanced around as if trying to remember where he was. "Oh yes, send it through Uhura."

"Very well Captain." Uhura spun back around in her chair and pressed random buttons as James cleared his throat and shook himself further out of his daze. A beep came from the arm of his chair letting him know that the message came through so he pushed the intercom button to hear it.

"Please, if anybody's out there, we need help. There are four of us, one very badly injured. We're unable to find anyone else to help us." The message went to static and James turned it off, exhaling a heavy sigh as he did so. For a few seconds he just sat there aware of everyone's eyes on him, especially Spock's. Without looking at Spock he shifted in his seat.

"Spock, come with me to the transporter room, I want to beam down and investigate." With that he stood up and walked toward the turbo lift, out of the corner of his eye he saw Spock follow suit. James quickly stopped in his track and turned to Uhura.

"Uhura, send the coordinates of the message to Scott right away."

"Yes Captain."

James carried on to the turbo lift with Spock behind him. When they were both inside the door slid shut and James grabbed the handle in order to go to the desired floor. An awkward silence fell around them like it always did when they were alone in the turbo lift together. James had this nervous tick where his fingers would drum along the handle while his palm curled around it; he wiped his other palm on the side of his leg. With a deep breath he blurted out the first thing that came to mind.

"How has your day been Spock?" Spock had been standing there just as calm as usual with his hands clasped behind his back and perfect posture. Both of his eyebrows rose at the question.

"It has been a normal work day Captain." Spock didn't move one bit after saying that like James had hoped he would, he just kept on standing there stoically. With the awkwardness being no less than before the only reply James could think of was a firm nod. After what felt like forever they came to their floor and James let go of the handle, stepping out in long, quick strides on his way to the transporter room. Gliding through yet another set of doors he found Scotty at the controls and pointed a finger at him as he walked by onto the transporter.

"Did you get those coordinates?"

"I did Captain."

"Good. Beam Spock and me down. I'll tell you how many to beam back up once I know what's going on." Spock took a place by the Captain and Scotty nodded as he pulled levers and pushed buttons. Scotty said one more thing before they energized.

"Be careful down there."

Upon arriving on the planet's surface James cautiously took a step forward and looked around. The ground was a barren plane of dirt surrounded by brown, rocky cliffs and every few feet or so there was a little patch of fire as if recently there had been an explosion. Squinting James looked further and caught sight of what appeared to be a cave. He turned to Spock.

"What are the planet's readings?" Spock held out his tricorder, waving it back and forth and taking little steps about until he got a reading of the planet's atmosphere.

"It is sufficient enough for human life Captain. The only problem I can find, and it is not a big one, is the large amount of carbon dioxide accumulated from the fire." James acknowledged.

"Let's take a look at that cave over there." James pushed on Spock's shoulder to get him moving. They dodged patches of fire and hopped over little rocks until they came to the cave opening. James stopped right there and shot his arm up to Spock's chest to keep him from going forward. For a second his arm lingered there while he pondered something then he let his hand brush against Spock's chest. He drew in a breath before speaking.

"Set your phaser to stun." They both did so and James glanced over at Spock worried that he might have noticed his weird impulse to touch his chest but the Vulcan didn't seem to pick up on it. Thankful for that James moved through the entrance, holding his phaser out in front of him. His eyes darted back and forth as if a monster would pop out at any moment. A sudden noise made him jump before he realized it was Spock stumbling due to his carelessness of the stones around him. James put his hands in front of him in order to brace Spock if needed but luckily Spock caught himself.

"Sorry Captain, I shall be more careful." James exhaled in relief.

"It's alright Spock but let's keep moving." Just then another noise, this time a gruff moan, echoed through the cave causing James to jerk his phaser toward its location and call out.

"Who's there?" His eyes hadn't adjusted to the dark yet so he stood there until they did. Four bodies came into focus, one of them clutching his arm and grunting in agony. Seeing someone in pain made James' protective instinct kick in. He bolted over to the man and gently taking hold of his arm, looked him in the eye.

"What happened? What's wrong with your arm?" James looked down, concern spread across his face when he saw pinch marks covering the skin, purplish-blue and swollen.

"I-I don't know. We all woke up outside unable to remember what happened before we fell unconscious so we ran in here to try and figure things out." He looked around at his companions as he spoke and they agreed with curt nods. James' brow furrowed.

"Was there an explosion?" The man stared at James in confusion.

"Why would you think there was an explosion?" James looked to Spock for help with explaining himself but all he got was an eyebrow raise.

"Well there are fire patches outside, dozens of them. I figured they were caused by an explosion of some sort." Understanding filled the man's expression.

"Oh, once a year it rains acid and that mixed with the heat of the desert, it causes those little bon fires."

"I see." The man winced as James unintentionally grazed one of his wounds with his finger as he stood up.

"I haven't introduced myself, I'm Captain Kirk and this is my first officer Mr. Spock. I'm going to beam you all aboard so our doctor Leonard McCoy can make sure you guys are alright." Without waiting for a reply he flipped open his communicator, "Kirk to Enterprise."

"Scott here, are you ready to beam up?"

"Yes, there will be six of us."

"Ey, Captain."

"Kirk out," James shut the communicator and stood completely still in order to be energized properly. All of the men were safely aboard the ship in a matter of seconds. Two officers came into the transporter room to assist the injured man too sick bay while James and the rest followed. Spock parted ways with them to tend to business on the bridge. Entering sick bay James went straight to McCoy who was taken aback by the crowd that suddenly barged in.

"Jim what is this? You could have given me a warning; I would have been more prepared." He wasn't one to like surprise visits. McCoy had this way of making James feel bad about everything with the way he said things. James' body stiffened with worry that he had maybe upset the doctor.

"I'm sorry Bones; it was kind of an emergency." McCoy shifted himself so that he could get the mob in his view.

"Well I'm looking at them right now and what I'm seeing is not life threatening as far as I can tell." He made sure to make it seem like he was angry. James' body tensed even more, he couldn't stand to see McCoy upset. Not knowing what to say he stammered.

"I don't know what you would have wanted me to do. I mean…I guess I could have called and said we were on our way. I just don't see what the problem is…" McCoy was extremely amused by how flustered the Captain was. It took every ounce of his strength to keep from letting a chuckle escape as James went on with his rant. Finally it was too much and he burst into hysterical laughter, doubling over, holding his arm to his stomach. This caught James off guard and he stopped talking mid-sentence letting out a confused sound.

"What?" James didn't get it. Now able to straighten up McCoy placed a hand on James' shoulder and continued to chuckle, there was a sparkle in his eye.

"I'm just messing with you. It's fine." James heaved a sigh for the third time that day and a grin appeared on his face. He playfully slapped McCoy's hand away.

"God, Bones! Why must you always do that?" They caught each other's eyes for a split second and both men subconsciously noted how adorable the other looked while smiling. McCoy shrugged and quickly retorted.

"It's just too damn funny watching you fall for it every time. Now if you will excuse me I must attend to my newly acquired patients." He turned on his heel and walked away. James watched as he conversed with each of the men and began to examine them. A few minutes had passed and he sat down with the intention of staying until McCoy made his diagnoses but the sick bay doors opened and Spock stepped into the room. McCoy glanced over from where he stood and saw how James' face lit up at the sight of Spock. A pang of jealousy shot through him, he had noticed the way James always looked at the first officer; he obviously had a thing for Spock and it annoyed McCoy to the core. Whether it was a sexual attraction or the fact that they were such good friends that made James look at Spock that way it didn't matter, McCoy thought he was supposed to be James' closest friend, not some stuck up, non-emotional prick of a Vulcan. McCoy returned to his work trying not to think about it.

"Captain, I was wondering if I could speak with you a moment." James leapt to his feet to address him.

"Of course you can Spock." Spock's gaze traveled around the room.

"I was hoping we could talk in private." James studied him quizzically.

"Sure." They walked together into McCoy's office, soon after taking a seat. It was Spock's turn to study James only he did it blankly. James waited for him to say something but words never came so he started the conversation. "So Spock, what's this about?" Spock put his hands together in front of him before speaking.

"You seemed a little off this morning Captain, I'm just here to make sure you're alright." James's eyes widened, he wasn't expecting that.

"Oh, thank you so much Spock for your concern but I'm fine." Spock's eyes narrowed.

"No Captain, I don't think you are. You've been like this for a couple of days now." James allowed himself a lighthearted laugh.

"Spock I assure you I am completely fine. Maybe I've been a bit tired but that's all." Again they just stared at each other, Spock actually looked worried and this for some reason troubled James.

"I do hope you are being honest Captain. I'd like to think you could confide in me but I understand if I make you uncomfortable." He diverted his eyes away from James as he ended the sentence. James tried to recapture them.

"There is never a time when you make me uncomfortable! Why would that thought even cross your mind?" Spock still avoided eye contact.

"That may be so Captain but I can tell you'd rather talk to McCoy about personal situations. Am I not your friend as well?" James seized Spock's shoulder and squeezed comfortingly, talking softer now.

"Spock… That's only because he'd be able to relate more to most of my problems." Spock moved his shoulder causing James' hand to drop.

"Clearly this is one of those times. I shall leave you now, I feel as though I am a bother." Spock lifted himself from the chair he sat in and walked awkwardly from the office. James wanted to go after him but he couldn't move due to the shock of how Spock had acted, it left him as dazed as he was this morning. Now that he thought about it he had been acting strange lately but not even he knew why. Standing slowly he too exited the room. When he stepped through the door McCoy was standing there waiting for him.

"Jim, can I have a word with you? There's something…" He shut his mouth when he detected how distraught James was. He creased his forehead.

"Jim, what's wrong?" James massaged his temple before answering.

"Nothing Bones, what did you find out?" McCoy's posture faltered.

"Uh, well, one of the men you brought in, his name is Jonah, has wounds that seem to be caused by some sort of electroshock, I should add that it's most likely from a man-made machine. He also has amnesia, they all do but his is the most severe…uh…god Jim I'm sorry to repeat myself but really, what's wrong? You look like you just saw a ghost." James started to feel a little irritated even though he shouldn't have been and backed a few steps away from McCoy needing some space.

"I'm sorry Bones, it's just that Spock kind of got to me…I think I need to go to my room." He left McCoy standing there. So Spock had gotten to him McCoy thought, he wondered in what way. It began to irk him how much James cared about Spock's non-existent feelings, what about his feelings? Why couldn't James just tell him what was going on? Again he tried not to think about it.

Walking quickly, almost at a light jog, James made it to his room with the feeling of anxiety welling up in the pit of his stomach. Why had Spock been like that? It was hard enough for James to hide how he felt about the Vulcan without the said Vulcan being all emotional around him. He almost couldn't control himself as he saw the all too human trait of sadness creeping onto his first officer's face. Sitting on the edge of his bed he went into a fit of panicked breathing as the image of the way Spock looked as he left the room entered his brain. Laying down he tried to even out his breathing. He couldn't recall when he first started feeling this way for Spock but it didn't really matter, the damage was done. Slowly but surely he fell asleep exhausted by his distress.


	2. Chapter 2

It hadn't been very late when James fell asleep so it wasn't surprising when he woke up just an hour later. His eyes fluttered open with blurred vision. Rubbing at his sleep covered eyes he sat up wondering if there was something he was supposed to be doing. He remembered Jonah and the others of whom he was now responsible for; he had to figure out some way of helping them. From what McCoy had observed it was certain that Jonah had been forced into some kind of machine, but why? The only way to get answers was to go back down to the place he found them and try to find where they came from. He decided that he should get Spock and McCoy to go with him. Getting up from his oh so welcoming bed he shuffled out of his room in search for Spock. The corridors were exceptionally crowded as he strode through them, greeting everyone he passed.

"Good afternoon Captain." James looked around for the random officer who had said that so he could respond and as he did he felt himself bump right into someone else. Holding on to the person's body he struggled to recover himself. He heard the man speak as he wrapped his arms around James to keep him from falling.

"Whoa… Sorry about that." Now stable James was able to see who the man was, his heart skipped a beat as he found McCoy's eyes delving into his; their grips on each other remained tight. James began to feel dizzy, not because he almost just fell but because of McCoy's persistent gaze, if he wasn't careful he could lose himself in those eyes forever. McCoy's reaction wasn't much different. He never got bored with how James reacted to everything, all of his expressions were equally captivating and this one was on top of the list. A moment later they loosened their hold and their bodies fell away. James gave a nervous chuckle but soon regained his normal composure.

"No worries, it's just as much my fault as it is yours." McCoy couldn't help but to smile. There it is again, James thought, that gorgeous smile.

"I was just on my way to see you Jim." A flutter swam through James' stomach at the way McCoy said his name, his voice always sounded so cordial. A thought came to him, he wondered if he was the only one McCoy spoke to in that way. Then something else came to the front of his mind, Spock. He pushed past McCoy.

"Sorry Bones, I was actually on my way to see Spock." McCoy spun around, offense written on his face, and called after him.

"Jim! Wait!" James was aggravated when he turned around and saw how afflicted the doctor was but still the want to see Spock was held fast in the front of his mind.

"Make it quick Bones." McCoy grew even more annoyed at the rude remark his supposed good friend just shot at him. He shut his eyes to calm himself before replying.

"If you would have just taken a few seconds to hear me out I would have told you that Spock and I were planning on meeting you in your quarters at around this time. So what I suggest is that we walk back there together right now so we can all talk." James was thoroughly embarrassed after hearing this, instantly regretting his actions. He sheepishly walked back the way he came with McCoy falling in step with him.

"I am truly sorry; I don't know what's gotten into me lately." Out of the corner of his eye he saw McCoy look over at him warmly.

"You're just getting yourself all worked up about something, I understand. Hell, I know there are times when I get like that. But Jim, sometimes you just have to let those things go and let them work themselves out. I assure you, life isn't as bad as it seems. Though there are some times when a bit of good alcohol is needed to help you through." They shared a hearty laugh at that as they neared James' room and found Spock was already there waiting patiently with his arms folded.

"Good to see you're feeling better Captain." James without a doubt gave Spock the biggest smile he's ever given anyone before. Once again McCoy was filled with all kinds of envy that he wasn't the one receiving it. James gave the command for his doors to open and the three of them traversed into the room. Making themselves as comfortable as they could James jumped right into talking about the situation at hand. He proposed his idea of them all going back down and looking further into what happened to the four men. Spock thought this over.

"I agree Captain. It is our duty to make sure that every life form we come across is in a safe environment. It is apparent that these men will not be safe if they go back without us finding what is threatening them." McCoy cut in.

"I also concur. I'm positive that I would be able to point out what might have given Jonah those contusions if I saw a device that has something that could have produced that kind of mark on someone's skin." James nodded glad that they were all in compliance to the plan.

"Then it's settled, we'll head out first thing tomorrow morning." With nothing else for them to say silence filled the air. Then out of the blue James insolently moved away from McCoy, adjusting his seat so that he was closer to Spock, and rested his hand on Spock's forearm; he whispered smoothly to Spock.

"About earlier, I'm sorry for not opening up. The honest truth is that I don't know why I've been acting so off. I've just been feeling so disoriented, unable to concentrate on anything." Seeing James make that kind of contact with Spock hurt McCoy more than anything, it was too much for him to handle. A ball of heat formed in his chest as he wished James would touch him like that. Realizing what he had just desired his lungs caved in and he couldn't breathe. He had always found James attractive but he never yearned for his touch this badly before. With that thought McCoy couldn't stand to be in the room any longer and stormed out.

McCoy's sudden absence alarmed James; it was odd for him to just leave like that. Whenever McCoy seemed sad or troubled it weighed James down with dismay. In any other time like this he would have went after him to see what was wrong but the sensuality of having Spock's arm in his hand kept him there. He let his hand glide over Spock's arm, causing Spock's arm to spasm at the touch, as he restated what he just said.

"So that's why I didn't talk to you earlier, I just don't know what going on." Without willing it to Spock's arm jolted away because it wasn't used to such contact. Spock was inwardly pleased that James had confessed this to him; he had wanted the Captain to talk to him for quite some time now. He looked at James with subtle concern; he didn't want to make his worry too obvious. Feeling bad about the harsh retreat his arm had made he chose to scoot his chair so that they were even closer to each other.

"Has something been bothering you Captain? Even the slightest bit of discontent about anything can cause someone to act incoherently." James was exasperated.

"Well of course something's bothering me Spock, I just can't pin point what it is." Spock's voice was soothing as he replied.

"Don't think too hard. Take a deep breath and tell me what's on your mind." James closed his eyes, inhaled deeply, and let all thought go. His eyes opened when he came to a conclusion.

"I guess I've just been worrying too much about losing the people I care about. When there's a mission I'm scared that one of them will get hurt, if one dies then I wouldn't be able to bear it. The fear is consuming me and there's one person in particular that I wouldn't be able to live without..." James looked right in Spock's eyes as he trailed off in his lament. Spock had the urge to pull James into his arms and tell him that it was going to be alright, that he wasn't going to lose anyone; that he would always be there. But he couldn't, he had to keep calm, he was a Vulcan. So instead he kept sitting there with his hands folded in his lap, giving the best support he could offer.

"It is quite normal for people to become fearful for the lives of the ones around them if they've been around each other for so long, especially if they are very close, you are not the only one Captain. I must admit that if I were fully human I too would have that problem." James hadn't heard Spock be so sincere in a very long time, that sincerity meant more to him than anything and it made him feel better than anything else would have.

"Thank you Spock, I just have a hard time dealing with it." Spock gave a half smile.

"You are always welcome Captain. May I ask who the person is?" James froze, he didn't mean to say that part, it just slipped out, and he'd been hoping Spock would dismiss it, the person he couldn't live without. There were actually two people he couldn't live without now that he thought about it, Spock, a given, and of course McCoy. The one he had been thinking of at that moment though was Spock but he didn't think he was ready to let Spock know how deeply he felt for him yet. Making a hasty decision he chose McCoy over Spock in the conversation. Unable to look Spock full on he turned his head to the side and barely audibly he answered.

"…McCoy…" Spock's mouth dropped open for half a second and then snapped shut, he couldn't help feeling crushed; secretly he was anticipating to hear his name. He raised both eyebrows to show his astonishment.

"What is it that makes you feel you can't live without him? Is it love? Do you love McCoy?" James blushed moderately at the concept.

"There are different types of love Spock, in a way I do love him. But I wouldn't go as far as me being in love with him." Spock shifted in his seat a little and a chuckle escaped.

"I never implied you were in love with him." James' blush grew and he in turn gave a sly smile.

"Are you toying with me Spock?" A grin spread over Spock's face and he simply said.

"Never" Spock rarely ever broke a smile and it was always so beautiful to James when he did. Hypnotizing him for a moment he wanted it to stay there but soon it went away. Well he had done it, he had talked to Spock and he felt a little bit better, not completely though but it was good enough for now. Standing up, James put his hands on his hips and stretched.

"Speaking of McCoy, we should go check on him."

"I agree he did leave quite abruptly." They slipped out of the room and headed for sick bay, sure to find McCoy there.

After McCoy left the others he raced through the corridors panting rapidly, holding his hand to his forehead, feeling like he was about to pass out. When he entered sick bay he went straight for the liquor cabinet and his trembling hand reached out for the strongest alcohol he had, he quickly downed as much of it as he could. Setting the bottle down, he slumped against the wall with his head spinning. He didn't understand how James could be so attracted to someone who couldn't feel, someone who could never return his feelings, at least not like McCoy could. He had to admit that Spock was a very handsome man and there was something about him that was truly intriguing but there was no emotion.

McCoy was brought from his contemplation by the sound of someone walking through the door; he looked to see who it was. James walked in and came to a halt when he saw the condition McCoy was in. McCoy shuffled in his direction.

"Ah! It's the Captain! Shouldn't you be with your alien friend?" James scrunched his forehead.

"Bones, I was worried about you." Just then Spock joined them in the room. McCoy turned to him making a wild gesture with his arms.

"Spock, get your cute little Vulcan ass over here." Spock's face held a curious expression and he stood his ground. McCoy moved clumsily over to him and reached his hand around him to squeeze his butt. Spock's body jerked and he yanked away.

"Doctor, please refrain from doing that." McCoy's eyes widened and he made a mock surprised face.

"Why, Mr. Spock, are you annoyed? Jim! By the gods, the Vulcan's annoyed! It's a miracle!" James bound to the doctor, grabbed him by the shoulders, and shook him.

"Bones snap out of it! You're drunk." Their eyes met and McCoy instantly became serious. A moment later McCoy's eyes fell, his face was weary.

"You're right Jim. I-I need to lie down." His body hunched over and James helped him to a bed. McCoy climbed in, groaning. James spoke to Spock.

"Spock, do you think McCoy and I could have a moment alone?"

"Yes Captain." Spock left them. James faced the doctor again and gently massaged his shoulder. McCoy closed his eyes, taking many deep breaths. James shook him softly causing McCoy to open his eyes a bit.

"Hey... I guess you took your own advice didn't you?" He gave a sweet, caring smile. McCoy grinned sleepily.

"Yeah, I guess I did."

"You should get some sleep; we have to head down to the planet tomorrow morning. And don't complain to me when you have a hangover." They laughed.

"Will do Jim..." McCoy quickly dozed off into sleep. James sat there watching him sleep for a few minutes. He absent-mindedly ran his hand through the doctor's hair before standing up to leave.


	3. Chapter 3

Sure enough when McCoy woke up the next morning he had a raging headache. He lazily slid out of bed and halfheartedly fixed his appearance. As he ate a bit of breakfast he noticed the time and realized that he should have contacted James by now. Going to the intercom he called for the Captain.

"Kirk here," McCoy cleared his throat before speaking.

"Uh hey it's me; I'm up and ready to go…even though I have a god awful migraine."

"It's about time, Spock and I have been waiting in the transporter room for you. And remember I said no complaining?" McCoy groaned.

"Ugh, I'll try my best." He heard James snicker on the other end.

"Well get yourself over here now so we can beam down."

"Alright, McCoy out," He turned the intercom off and took one more look at himself before heading out. 'Damn I don't look too hot,' he said to himself. Shrugging he stepped out of the room.

In the transporter room Spock and James stood waiting. They were side by side both just standing there with nothing to talk about like always. A couple of times James would steal a glance at Spock and Spock would see him do it out of the corner of his eye. One of those times Spock turned his head slightly to look back at James and found James looking at his body as if he were in a trance. James then felt Spock staring at him and adverted his eyes like he was caught doing something wrong, Spock secretly found that amusing. James mentally reprimanded himself for looking at Spock so much, he was sure Spock would find it curious. James was able to keep from looking for a bit but soon the urge was too strong and he tried to sneak another little peak but Spock was too quick and caught James' eyes. James froze when they made eye contact and couldn't look away, a corner of Spock's mouth lifted into a half smile. James could actually feel himself blush a little, hoping it wasn't too noticeable. James didn't know what to do or how to react so he was glad when McCoy walked in at that moment, shoving past them.

"Ok let's get on with it. I'm telling you though; you might have to force me onto the transporter because I don't want to do this today, not at all." James rolled his eyes but smiled, everything McCoy did was just too cute. Spock raised his eyebrows.

"It seems that McCoy is going to be exceptionally irritable today Captain." McCoy put on an even more annoyed expression and James pressed his lips together in an attempt not to laugh.

"Leave the poor doctor alone Spock, he took a little too much of his own advice." James began to lead McCoy by the arm up to the platform. "Come on Bones, it's not going to be that bad." McCoy's eyes widened and his brow furrowed.

"Not that bad? God Jim, you really know how to talk me into something don't you."

"Oh come on, you know what I mean." The three men took their places beside each other on the platform and felt the familiar tingling of being energized. When they arrived on the planet McCoy, seeing the desert for the first time, glanced around in bewilderment.

"The thing we need to ask ourselves, right now, is… where do we start?" Spock was already ahead of them, holding out his tricorder, trying to find some sort of life form in the area. When he found something he turned to James.

"There is an outpost only 3.857 miles from here, I suggest we start there." James thought about it, nodded, and then walked over to McCoy.

"Do you feel up to walking that far? I'll understand if you don't want to go with us." He very much wanted to go with them so he decided that he should just suck it up and deal with the consequences of too much alcohol.

"Yes Jim, I want to go with you. I really should anyway; you never know what might happen." He was right Jim thought; they never know what kind of danger could be lurking. Then his fear of either one of his friends getting hurt resurfaced, but he had to ignore it.

"Good, I'm glad you'll be joining us." He patted him on the back and turned to Spock. "That'll do Spock, let's go check it out." They set off in the direction of the outpost and started on their trek. The sand felt like snow as they trudged on with some areas hard and packed in and others soft and deep where James would trip and stumble, when this happened McCoy would reach out for him and keep him from falling. One of those times McCoy didn't reach out in time and James did fall. McCoy rushed towards him to make sure he was alright with concern troubling his face.

"Jim! Are you ok? I'm so sorry I didn't break your fall." He pulled out his tricorder and started to run it over James to see if anything was wrong; James pushed it away and chuckled, embarrassed.

"Bones, I'm fine! You're overreacting; it's not your fault. I'm such a klutz. I'm the one who should be sorry for delaying us so much." McCoy put away his tricorder and took James' hand. He pulled James up slowly as he himself stood and looked into his eyes, subconsciously tightening his grip as he did.

"It's alright Jim, and, I just worry about you too much, that's all. You're my best friend, if anything happened to you…" Looking away James blushed.

"I know Bones, same here." Now McCoy was blushing and he tried to hide it. Spock had witnessed every second of the situation and he was getting quite jealous.

"Sorry to interrupt Captain but we should keep moving; it's getting late." James quickly straightened up.

"I agree." So they carried on and as they did McCoy's head began to feel like it was going to split open, the migraine was still very unbearable. He started to swerve as he walked and James noticed this. They were close to the outpost now and James figured they could take a short rest before they arrived. The Captain led his friends to a cluster of rocks they could use as seats and helped McCoy down onto one, supporting his back with his hands.

"You seem a bit tense Bones." McCoy arched his back, rubbing at his sides.

"Yeah, you could say that. God, I swear everything hurts. Really, I'm never drinking that much again; I can tell you that right now." James tentatively placed a hand on McCoy's shoulder.

"Hey, I can give you a massage if you want." McCoy could feel himself become even more tense, not from the pain but from James' offer.

"Uh, sure…that would be nice." Without saying a word James positioned himself behind McCoy, his hand shifting slowly to the crook of his neck and his other hand clasping the opposite crook, and proceeded to massage his shoulders soothingly.

"How does that feel?" McCoy sighed.

"It feels good…" James took that as his cue to intensify the action which McCoy thoroughly appreciated. Soon McCoy began to let out long, deep breaths; James' rough fingers digging deep into his neck was one of the most pleasurable sensations he had ever felt. McCoy didn't know how long he had been longing for the Captain's touch; he never really wanted anything sexual, just something intimate, like this. After a while a soft moan vibrated within McCoy's chest. James couldn't deny the fact that he was getting pretty aroused from the friction of his hands rubbing against McCoy's skin and in return hearing the almost erotic sounds escape his friend's mouth. He figured he should stop before he got too excited so he slowly brought the motion to a halt and gave McCoy a light squeeze before removing his hands and walking to the nearest rock to sit down. Because McCoy was in such a daze it took him a while to realize James had walked away.

"Oh…thanks, that was nice." James smiled and folded his arms.

"Anytime Bones…" McCoy looked over at James and flashed a half smile.

"I really tried to suck it up Jim, believe me." James shrugged.

"I understand. I'm sure it's a bad headache. I don't mind staying here for a while." McCoy sighed heavily.

"I just wish there were somewhere I could rest my head without laying on a damn jagged rock or getting sand in my hair." James shifted where he sat nervously not knowing whether he should say what he was thinking about saying but decided to in the end.

"You could come rest your head on my shoulder if you want... I feel bad for making you walk so far." McCoy couldn't believe what he just heard; James said he could lean on him! He felt butterflies in the pit of his stomach and didn't know how to reply, he was scared he'd seem too eager.

"Oh, um…thanks for the offer but I wouldn't want to be a bother…" James unfolded his arms and shook his head.

"No, it wouldn't be a bother at all…" McCoy ran his hands over his legs anxiously.

"Well it would help with the headache." Unsure whether he could hold back his enthusiasm he lifted himself up, shuffled over to the Captain, and hesitantly sat down on the rock next to him. James sat there stiffly with his hands in his lap and his eyes looking down as McCoy snuggled his head into the nook of his neck, he couldn't help but smile. Having McCoy so close felt right to James, he had always cared so much for him and always wanted to be there for him. Unfortunately they had forgotten that Spock was with them therefore he had witnessed the whole scene and was now standing beside them feeling extremely awkward.

As James and McCoy closed their eyes and lost themselves in comfort Spock abruptly mentioned that there was a plant about a quarter mile back that he would like to take the time to examine. James merely nodded his head in acknowledgment and Spock sauntered off in the direction they had come. Spock tried to keep their closeness from bothering him; there was no logical reason for him to care but he couldn't help being upset by it, he was jealous. He resented human emotions, to Vulcans it was a sign of weakness and that's exactly how he felt in that moment, weak. Never had someone tried to force his human side to the surface of his being, in his childhood or anytime really, as much as James had. Sure his mother had tried but her attempts came nowhere close to how James' affected him. With the way James spoke to him and every time he touched him his human side came out more and more to the point where there was no letting go of his emotions, to the point where he needed James, needed to feel his touch, to hear his voice. James was his conductor of life, the only thing that made him feel like he could actually be human, even if only partially, and if anyone or anything else took him away then that would be the end of Spock, he would be dead.

Spotting a plant Spock went over to it and sat down with his tricorder in hand. Attempting to go along with his excuse for leaving he ran the tricorder over the plant and got its readings. Then setting the device down, he plucked the plant from the ground and fiddled with it. He couldn't concentrate on examining it because every time he tried he would realize again how alone he was. Everyone he knew figured that he was content with being alone because he didn't have the emotion to care if anyone was around him but they were wrong, he was not content with being alone, he hated it. Right now he felt left out sitting by himself in the sand with James and McCoy happy together. It was clear to him now that James cared more for McCoy than he had ever cared or ever will care for him. How could he care for an alien who supposedly never felt anything? Just then a single tear escaped from his eye and fell down his cheek. In his troubled state he crushed the plant in his fist and threw it from him. Balling up his fists he put them to his temples and willed himself not to cry any further.

Suddenly there was a sharp pain in his side and he looked down to find he had been hit by a dart, pulling it out he saw that it was a tranquilizer. Beginning to feel lightheaded he made an effort to stand. He was able to make it to a crouched position when he was attacked by someone and knocked flat. Rolling over he saw that the person had a staff which he used to exceedingly hit Spock with. Spock had no strength left to fight back with due to the dart so he tried to block the staff from hitting his head but it was no use, the man would just in turn aim for his stomach. Without any other option Spock began to call out for help, yelling for Kirk and McCoy. Out of nowhere the man was joined by another who also repeatedly hit Spock with a staff. Soon Spock was overpowered, feeling blood trickle down his face, and he blacked out.

Back at the rock cluster McCoy felt much better and was ready to venture to the now visible outpost. He stood up, turned to James, and stretched.

"Well as good as the idea of sitting around and doing nothing sounds I think we should get a move on; those men up on our ship are counting on us." James yawned.

"But it was so cozy; I could have fallen asleep right there." McCoy waved his statement off.

"Yeah, yeah… we need to go find Spock first though. I think he went somewhere over there." He gestured to where they came from, near the side of the cliffs. James stood, brushing the sand and debris from his clothes.

"I'm sure he didn't go far." McCoy rolled his eyes.

"You never know with that green-blooded Vulcan, I'm telling you, he's unpredictable." James laughed.

"I agree with you there Bones." Together they traveled across the sand to walk along the side of the cliffs. There were a few archways along the cliffs that lead into an open area and James chose to enter one in search for his first mate while the doctor continued ahead. Eventually McCoy came to the spot where Spock had been and spotted his tricorder that was left in the scuffle. He ran over to it and picked it up, noticing also the crushed plant beside it. This was clear evidence that something bad had happened.

"Oh my god… Jim! Jim, come her, quick!" James heard McCoy's pleas and ran to him as fast as he could.

"What? Bones, what is it?" He came to a stop by McCoy, panting, and the doctor showed him Spock's tricorder.

"I found this just laying here. I have a strong feeling someone took him." McCoy turned the tricorder over in his hands frowning.

"No… I knew I shouldn't have let him be alone here!" James knelt down with his fist to his mouth, frustrated and worried; then he saw the crumpled plant and picked it up. His heart sank knowing that Spock needed help and he wasn't there for him, he was probably hurt now and James couldn't bear the thought of it; he was sent into a minor fit of hysteria.

"Damn it, damn it, damn it… god, if he's badly hurt I will kill whoever put their hands on him! I swear my life on it! Damn it!" McCoy was shocked by his outburst but he understood; he also was greatly concerned.

"Don't worry Jim, we'll find him; I promise." James calmed down a bit and straightened up, still holding the plant.

"Do you think the people who took him came from the outpost?" McCoy nodded.

"I think that would be our best guess."

With the taste of blood in his mouth and a horrendous pain erupting in his abdomen Spock came back to consciousness. Bleary eyed he looked around at his surroundings, an empty, dreary room with dim lighting. With a loud clang the door flung open and a very pissed off man walked through the threshold. Spock jumped but remained composed. Walking over to him the man slammed him against the wall and glared at him.

"I don't know who you are but all I know is that your Captain took my men and they were alive. I need them dead. So you better hope that your friends come soon so I can get them back or I'm going to make you wish you were dead."


End file.
